"You know what you get when you combine cranberry and apple juice? Crapple juice."

—Leigh (12) not aware of the existence of cran-apple juice

"Next year I'm going to be Santa Claus for Halloween."

—Tyler (10) with a pretty good idea

"I can (ice) skate backwards. I never tried it but I can do it. It's just like walking backwards except slipperier."

—Micah (6) showing some confidence

". . . and we can do these things if we have faith, trust, and pixie dust."

—Kara (8) closing her family home evening lesson

"Tyler, you get an 'F' for singing that song . . . well actually, you did try so you get an 'F+'."

—Kara (8) showing her compassion

"Eye-Robot"

—Tyler's (10) answer to the question, "What movie starts with the letter 'E'?"

"I have Britney Spears-like reflexes."
—Leigh (12) sharing something that I'm not sure I want to know the meaning of

"I like to spend money. When I have kids, I'm going to buy them lots of stuff."

—Micah (6) exposing his charitable side

"I like to sniff the cafeteria for fries because when there's fries, there's a good meal."

—Kara (8) and her school lunch theories

"Oh, he chose wrongteous!"

—Kara (8) disappointed at an individuals unrighteous decision

"Dad, what kind of eardrums do you have? I have bongos."

—Micah (6) sharing the secret behind his energetic behavior

"Who doesn't love a can of slimy meat?!"
- Kara (8), commenting on spam, one of her favorite foods.

"If I have twin boys, I'm going to name them George Washington and George Clooney."
- Kara (8) telling us names she likes.

Kara: "Mom. I'm afraid to tell Santa what I want."
Mom: "Why?"
Kara: "Because I'm afraid he's going to get me the other kind of cell phone and then I will have a bill to pay every month".
- Kara (8) worried about how specific she needs to be with Santa about getting a go-phone since he messed her order for an ipod last year.

"Let's buy him a Jesus tattoo!"
—Kara (8) suggesting a gift for her father's birthday

"Dad, did you know that beavers don't brush their teeth?"
—Micah (6) sharing his animal knowledge

"I know a synonym for honeymoon . . . sticky buns!
—Tyler (10) demonstrating his quick wit

"Can I get a scribe?"
—Tyler (10) after his mom asked him to try to do his homework in spite of his sore wrist

"Mom, in hard times, would you eat the Betta?"
—Tyler (10) conscious of the economic downturn

"Am I supposed to do this 'bad boy'?"
—Micah (6) pointing to a page of homework that needed to get done

"My breath smells like a newborn fish."
—Micah (6) being Micah

"I asked Santa for an iPod but he gave me an MP3 player instead."
—Kara (8) wondering what Santa was thinking

"I can't take Micah seriously when he's naked."

—Tyler (10) while listening to his brother who just came out of the shower

"My feet always smell like Subway bread."
—Micah (5) making an observation

"My Kara senses tell me that I don't know."
—Kara (8) answering a question asked by Leigh

Micah: "Dad when I was on the toilet I was singing this song, 'When you're sitting on the toilet and there's no more toilet paper be a man, use your hand' . . . and then I did use my hand."
Dad: What?!?!?
Micah: "Just kidding."
—Micah (5) showing his sense of humor

"Something Yummy."
—Leigh's (12) response when asked what she wanted for lunch

Micah: "Is today Fast Sunday?"
Dad: "No"
Micah: "Yes!"
—Micah (5) looking forward to snacks in primary

"It stinks with a capital 'S'."
—Kara (8) commenting on the Porta Potty at ward camp

"Did dad go to an Asian school or something?"
—Tyler (10) while looking through his father's Pearl City High School yearbook

"Daddy, who do you think is hot, Hannah Montana or Mommy?"
—Micah (5) asking a no-brainer

Tyler (10) discovered a new way to eat saimin.

"I found this POG on the street. I'm a lucky man."
—Micah (5)

"I know where you can buy POGs. At a store called Swap Meet."

—Tyler (10) unfamiliar with what a swap meet is

"You're so Karatating!"
—Tyler (9) irritated by his sister Kara's behavior

"Great. What am I supposed to do with this?"
—Kara (8) looking at a batch of panipopo (coconut buns) fresh out of the oven. She hates panipopo.

Micah: "Mommy, did you feed my fish dinner?"
Mom: "Yes."
Micah: "Thank you."
—Micah (5) being responsible

Mom: "Micah, what are you doing in (the bathroom)."
Micah: "I'm combing my hair. It's okay if you say that I look ugly when I come out. . . . What do you think?"

Dad: "Stop playing with those (scout) flags! Those flags belong to Jesus!"
Kara (8): "Did Jesus even have money back then?"

"We're having fish and chips for dinner . . . minus the chips part."
—Leigh's (11) disappointing announcement

"I'm putting cold water in the tub so I can practice swimming."

—Micah (5) excited to practice what he learned at his first swimming lesson

Micah (5) just reminded me of the following conversation from December 2007 when he was 4 years old:
After coming home from work I noticed an enormous wrapped box with my name on it sitting next to the Christmas tree. Micah excitedly came to me and said, "Daddy I want to tell you something!" Sensing a spoiler message I quickly interrupted, "Micah don't say anything!"
Micah: "No daddy listen, listen!"
Dad: "Micah don't say anything!"
Micah: "No daddy listen!"
Dad: "Okay, what?
Micah: "Daddy it's NOT a toolbox. It's NOT a toolbox."

"Mine has 5 coats . . . and a sweater."
—Tyler (9) painting his pinewood derby car.

"Tyler didn't fart, he broke wind."
—Kara (8) trying to be proper with her terminology.

Before the tournament: "I need at least $10 at the most because my coach said to bring $5."
After the tournament: "Oh yeah Mom. I have $2 change left over."
—Leigh (11) letting us know how much her volleyball tournament fee was.

Micah: "I know the truth. Christmas presents come from parents not from Santa."
Dad: "Who told you that?"
Micah: "Santa."
—Micah (5) commenting out of the blue

Tyler: "Micah, do you like girls?"

Micah: "Only the pretty ones."

—Tyler (9) and Micah (5) having an interesting conversation

" I have a headache. Feel my head."
—Micah (5) trying to prove his point

"Why do you guys sleep in the same bed. When I get married I'm going to have separate beds."
—Tyler (9) talking to mom and dad

"I like my kind of eggs."
—Kara's (8) response while cooking eggs after her father curiously asked her, "I thought you didn't like eggs?"

"Eat, sleep and poop."
—Tyler's (9) suggestion for our family "Coat of Arms" slogan

Kara: "Ugh! I HATE subtraction! I'd rather do partial-sum algorithms!"
(Mom laughing)
Kara: "Why are you laughing?"
Mom: "Because partial-sum algorithms sounds harder to do."
Kara: "That's because you don't know how to do it. I thought moms are supposed to be the smart ones."
—Kara (8), tired from doing mostly subtraction problems for homework.

"I'm starving my brains out!"
—Leigh (11) exclaiming her hunger

"He's bleeding blood!"
-Micah (5), explaining what happens when you get cut.

"Mom, I want to learn how to dance Fijian good. You have to dance good to be chosen to be a Fijian Warrior. I want to be a Fijian Warrior. I don't want to be a Fijian Slave!"
- Tyler (9), explaining that he had to dance well to be a Fijian Warrior in the May Day Program.

"Who invented swimming? I know! The person who was first drowning!"
—Tyler (9), asking this while looking out at the ocean on our way to see Grandma and Grandpa.

"I know how to make a strawberry smoothie. You get strawberries and ice, then you drill it up and if it's not good enough you drill it some more and if it's still not good enough you drill it again."
—Micah (5) sharing his culinary knowledge

Micah: "Mommy, how come the water doesn't go down in the sink?"
Mommy: "Because someone put toilet paper down the drain."
Micah: (Silence)
—Micah (5) demonstrating how silence can sometimes mean guilt

"Don't say 'jammies' out loud. Nobody says 'jammies' anymore."
—Leigh (11) embarrassed that her mom used the term "jammies" (aka pajamas) while shopping at Walmart

Kara: "What is your bodyguard name?"
Tyler: "Moose."
Kara: "I like it!"
Tyler: "Actually, I'm changing it to elk."
—Kara (8) and Tyler (9) preparing to role play

"Oh, I'm man-made."
—Tyler (9) after his mom said the definition of artificial is man-made.

"Our prophet is President Esmonson, Thomas Esmonson."
—Kara (8) answering the question of who our current prophet is.

"Baracko Bama. First name Baracko. Last name Bama."
—Micah's (5) answer to the question "Who is this?" as dad pointed to President Obama's picture in a magazine

"Mom, that doughnut is lonely. He wants me to be his friend."
—Micah (5) looking at the last doughnut in the display case at the BYUH Seasider snackbar

"Stay with me when I do my homework so I don't do other things."
—Kara (8) with wisdom beyond her years

Micah's church drawings

Technically not a quote, but still very interesting. These are drawings Micah made during today's sacrament meeting. He described each picture and I labeled it accordingly.

"The clock says my teacher's name — Wong . . . Wong . . . Wong . . ."
—Tyler (9) listening to the BYU-Hawaii bell tower clock ring at noon

"What's the difference between Opera and Soap Opera?"
—Tyler (9)

"I'm home schooled. Go ask mom."
—Micah's (5) sleepy excuse for not waking up to get ready for school

"Two eyeballs!"
—Micah's (5) comeback while pointing to his father after being told he needs to go to school because his nose was running not due to illness but because he just finished crying

"I love ice cream! Go cows!"
—Tyler (9)

"Mommy, I can count to a hundred. Wanna see?"
—Micah (5) wanting to share what he learned at school

"Daddy, if I'm not crying I'm OK."
—A tearless Micah (5) after being asked if he was OK following a fall

"A foolish man builds his house on a blow hole."
—Tyler (9) after watching a blow hole spout on the rocks at Turtle Bay

"No, I want to crush him."
—Micah (5) when asked if he wanted to watch Batman: The Brave and the Bold

"You are a thief! You took all the hot water!"
—Micah (5) angry at his sister after taking a cold shower

"It looks goooood . . . I don't want to sell it."
—Leigh (11) admiring the loaves of bread she made for a fundraiser

"Where are their parents? Are they in a foster home?"
—Tyler (9) while watching Baby Looney Tunes